Sadness can take over and make a person forget about all the greatness that this world has to offer. If you think about it, the thing you are most sad about is usually the thing that is lacking the most in your life. For example, I know people that have the same degree of sadness but one person's reason is getting reprimanded at work, and the other person's reason is feeling underappreciated in a relationship. Person A [reprimand at work] may be more sensitive to this than to love because maybe his father was always telling him he wasn't good enough but his mother did damage control by loving him extra. He may become a workaholic not because he wants to make money, but because he overanalyzes every aspect of his duties and spends way too much time on one task to make sure its perfect. Person B [feeling underappreciated in a relationship] may be used to her parents telling her and showing her that they love her, but their attention may have been devoted to another sibling that was of special needs or was a trouble maker.
Sadness is emotionally and physically draining. But please, do not confuse sadness with depression. Sadness is caused by a known reason and its temporary. Its not a chemical imbalance. Depression on the other hand, is characterized by prolonged sadness for no known reason, affects daily life activities, and may be caused by a chemical imbalance. I tell my clients all the time, sadness is a natural emotion just like happiness and anger. Its something that will be felt throughout your lifetime and you can't run away from it. Everyone gets sad about something but all you can do is let the emotion run its course.
Got a new intake to do. I guess the best thing about my job is that I hear stories that are far worse than what I'm experiencing and it makes me grateful to be able to go home and feel safe and comforted.
31 March 2009
27 March 2009
DSM these nuts!
DSM-IV-TR: Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fourth Edition, Text Revision.
The DSM is the bible for any professionals that work with people and human behavior. It's interesting, yesterday I was at a training and one of the presenters gave a quick blurb about social workers that empowered me and made me proud of my profession. He said, if you need a teeth pulled, you go to a dentist right? You see a specialist for whatever issue you have. He said, Social Workers specialize in Human Behavior. This made me think because I just assumed that people who go into social work already have a knack for reading people and observing their behaviors. I feel priveliged because my undergrad degree in Psychology, and my graduate degree in Social Work really has refined my abilities to sit back and observe a person, listen to them speak about themselves briefly, get a quick 411 on their family dynamics, and come with a diagnosis and treatment plan. As expected, this is extremely easy for me to do when I first meet a person, but I dont have that same capabilitie with long-time friends. First its unethical and second I'm competely biased.
In graduate school one of my classes [Psychopathology] required me to read and memorize the entire DSM. The DSM is 942 pages. Now mind you, my memory is not the best, but, if you are given a topic of interest, its not a task, its a pleasure. I actually ENJOYED reading the DSM and every now and then I take it off my bookshelve and skim the pages, reading all the disorders and symptoms. When I watch SVU and Dr Hong [I think that's his name] diagnoses one of the characters, I usually grab my DSM and verify that he has diagnosed it correctly. I really am a nerd. LOL.
So, I randomly opened my DSM and here is today's diagnosis for the day.
Dissociative Fugue: characterized by sudden, unexpected travel away from home or one's customary place of work, accompanied by an inability to recall one's past and confusion about personal identity or the assumption of a new identity.
Now tell me you arent just blown away by how interesting this is???
The DSM is the bible for any professionals that work with people and human behavior. It's interesting, yesterday I was at a training and one of the presenters gave a quick blurb about social workers that empowered me and made me proud of my profession. He said, if you need a teeth pulled, you go to a dentist right? You see a specialist for whatever issue you have. He said, Social Workers specialize in Human Behavior. This made me think because I just assumed that people who go into social work already have a knack for reading people and observing their behaviors. I feel priveliged because my undergrad degree in Psychology, and my graduate degree in Social Work really has refined my abilities to sit back and observe a person, listen to them speak about themselves briefly, get a quick 411 on their family dynamics, and come with a diagnosis and treatment plan. As expected, this is extremely easy for me to do when I first meet a person, but I dont have that same capabilitie with long-time friends. First its unethical and second I'm competely biased.
In graduate school one of my classes [Psychopathology] required me to read and memorize the entire DSM. The DSM is 942 pages. Now mind you, my memory is not the best, but, if you are given a topic of interest, its not a task, its a pleasure. I actually ENJOYED reading the DSM and every now and then I take it off my bookshelve and skim the pages, reading all the disorders and symptoms. When I watch SVU and Dr Hong [I think that's his name] diagnoses one of the characters, I usually grab my DSM and verify that he has diagnosed it correctly. I really am a nerd. LOL.
So, I randomly opened my DSM and here is today's diagnosis for the day.
Dissociative Fugue: characterized by sudden, unexpected travel away from home or one's customary place of work, accompanied by an inability to recall one's past and confusion about personal identity or the assumption of a new identity.
Now tell me you arent just blown away by how interesting this is???
22 March 2009
Its the American Way
I realized that I didnt infact have writers block, I just wasnt pissed off enough to feel a need to vent. Well today is a new day.
As any other typical weekend morning, I discussed aftercare plans with my client. Like any typical American that is addicted to drugs, she has no health insurance, has lost everything, and only has the support of one family member left. I handed her a flyer for CA meetings [Cocaine Anonymous] and invited her to come back to Detox for the evening meetings. Behind my client stands the nurse, whom shakes her head and says that the schedule is outdated and provided her with a phone number to call for a current meeting schedule. When the client leaves, the nurse proceeds to inform me that Apalachee Center, Inc has decided to do away with ALL meetings in Detox. Now let me tell you, I was in shock and disbelief. They gain and lose nothing by these meetings. The meetings are run by recovering addicts that do it for free. Detox is open 24 hours so it costs nothing to have people sit in a room and talk about their recovery. There justification for this decision is that they feel a person in Detox may not be ready for a meeting, and he or she should go see a therapist and after some time, the therapist will decide if they should go to meetings. I sat in amazement and disbelief. The typical Detox client does not have any means to see a therapist, if they did, they would already be in treatment. Granted there are meetings in other places, but now there is one less meeting. How can we offer support and hope to our clients if Apalachee keeps taking away FREE resources. There is no justification for this. It's like they are trying to keep them addicted, so they can come back and utilize a bed, and then they can get refunded by the state for it. Typical for social service agencies that have businessmen for CEO's and have no intention of trying to better society and its people.
Times like today validate my wishes to move to a socialist country.
As any other typical weekend morning, I discussed aftercare plans with my client. Like any typical American that is addicted to drugs, she has no health insurance, has lost everything, and only has the support of one family member left. I handed her a flyer for CA meetings [Cocaine Anonymous] and invited her to come back to Detox for the evening meetings. Behind my client stands the nurse, whom shakes her head and says that the schedule is outdated and provided her with a phone number to call for a current meeting schedule. When the client leaves, the nurse proceeds to inform me that Apalachee Center, Inc has decided to do away with ALL meetings in Detox. Now let me tell you, I was in shock and disbelief. They gain and lose nothing by these meetings. The meetings are run by recovering addicts that do it for free. Detox is open 24 hours so it costs nothing to have people sit in a room and talk about their recovery. There justification for this decision is that they feel a person in Detox may not be ready for a meeting, and he or she should go see a therapist and after some time, the therapist will decide if they should go to meetings. I sat in amazement and disbelief. The typical Detox client does not have any means to see a therapist, if they did, they would already be in treatment. Granted there are meetings in other places, but now there is one less meeting. How can we offer support and hope to our clients if Apalachee keeps taking away FREE resources. There is no justification for this. It's like they are trying to keep them addicted, so they can come back and utilize a bed, and then they can get refunded by the state for it. Typical for social service agencies that have businessmen for CEO's and have no intention of trying to better society and its people.
Times like today validate my wishes to move to a socialist country.
18 March 2009
I apologize
For not writing in my blog lately. I have had a major case of writer's block. Be patient, my creative juices will come pouring out soon.
07 March 2009
Why some women go back to their abusers
(CNN) -- A middle-of-the-night fight, a surprise pullout from the Grammy Awards, leaked photos, a police investigation -- new pieces of the puzzle of the alleged assault of pop singer Rihanna by her boyfriend Chris Brown have been emerging since early February.
Singers Rihanna and Chris Brown, shown performing in December, are rumored to be back together.
Then, nearly three weeks after the alleged battery, the couple was reportedly together again. The reconciliation was reported just days before Brown's arraignment, which is expected Thursday in Los Angeles, California. Update: Chris Brown charged with two felonies
Brown, 19, has issued an apology for "what transpired" but neither he nor Rihanna, who just turned 21, has directly addressed the allegations.
Many would ask why anyone would return to an abusive partner after leaving, but therapists who treat both abusers and victims say it's common.
The effect is like a "pendulum of pain," said Steven Stosny, counselor and founder of the anger and violence management program CompassionPower, which treats people convicted of abuse in the home.
Abuse victims will "leave out of either fear, anger or resentment," he said. "But then, after the fear, anger or resentment begins to subside, they feel guilt, shame, anxiety, and that takes them back."
After a violent incident, there is often a "honeymoon period" during which the abuser may apologize profusely, give the victim gifts and persuade the victim to stay, experts say. But when that period is over, the abuser may once again become violent.
The reasons for returning to an abusive partner may relate to the days of early humans, who had to fend for themselves in the wild. The powerful psychological mechanisms that lead people to stay in abusive relationships may have developed for survival reasons, Stosny said.
"To leave an attachment relationship -- a relationship where there's an emotional bond -- meant certain death by starvation or saber-tooth tiger," he said.
Abuse happens in both low-income and high-income couples, said Joanna Snawder, who counsels students and community members at the Metropolitan State College of Denver in Colorado. A wealthy woman who has never worked may not want to change her lifestyle, while a poor woman may be financially dependent on her boyfriend or husband.
Regardless, women may not want to break off an abusive relationship because they are afraid to be independent, don't know how to take care of themselves or don't want to face shame from friends and family, she said.
Sometimes the abuser can get his partner to stay with him through manipulation, for instance, telling a woman that he will kill himself if she leaves him, said Mark Crawford, a clinical psychologist based in Roswell, Georgia. Crawford has seen many women stay in relationships because they couldn't bear the guilt of an outcome such as this.
"There are some women who need to be needed so badly they'll put up with anything," Crawford said. "Even if the guy beats the crap out of them, they just feel that responsible for the other person."
The term "the cycle of abuse" is often used to describe how coming from an abusive family is believed to make an individual more likely to be an abuser or to stay in an abusive relationship. "Unless we do a lot of psychological work, we often repeat family structures and dynamics that seem normal to us," Snawder said.
On the other hand, some people who grow up in abusive households do not repeat the behavior they saw at home, she said.
One student Snawder advises voluntarily went back to her abusive boyfriend after having a restraining order placed against him. They are together, but the man is assaulting the young woman again.
"It's really important that a woman reach out and get support from friends, family or a counselor who can help her see that she doesn't have to go back to that relationship," she said.
Men aren't always the abusers. There are relationships in which the woman is the abuser and the man is the victim, and all of the behavioral patterns happen in reverse. For instance, the woman makes the man feel like it's his fault for being beaten, Crawford said.
"Those men just don't have the sense of self to say 'This is not acceptable,'" he said.
Stosny's celebrity clients who have been abusive to their romantic partners may have been negatively affected by their rise to fame early in life, he said. They see themselves as above others, and feel they are entitled to punch someone whenever they feel like it.
"I had one professional basketball player who sexually assaulted a girl. He really in his heart didn't believe that she didn't want to have sex with him," Stosny said.
Can there ever be a happy ending for an abusive relationship? Experts agree that it's unusual, but a relationship in which a partner has been violent can become healthy again if, and only if, the abusive person seeks counseling to change his or her mindset.
"If you don't believe that you have a problem, and you believe the person drove you to it, you're going to have a really hard time seeing that you have a problem," Snawder said.
In practice, however, the victim usually just needs to move on to someone else, she said.
Singers Rihanna and Chris Brown, shown performing in December, are rumored to be back together.
Then, nearly three weeks after the alleged battery, the couple was reportedly together again. The reconciliation was reported just days before Brown's arraignment, which is expected Thursday in Los Angeles, California. Update: Chris Brown charged with two felonies
Brown, 19, has issued an apology for "what transpired" but neither he nor Rihanna, who just turned 21, has directly addressed the allegations.
Many would ask why anyone would return to an abusive partner after leaving, but therapists who treat both abusers and victims say it's common.
The effect is like a "pendulum of pain," said Steven Stosny, counselor and founder of the anger and violence management program CompassionPower, which treats people convicted of abuse in the home.
Abuse victims will "leave out of either fear, anger or resentment," he said. "But then, after the fear, anger or resentment begins to subside, they feel guilt, shame, anxiety, and that takes them back."
After a violent incident, there is often a "honeymoon period" during which the abuser may apologize profusely, give the victim gifts and persuade the victim to stay, experts say. But when that period is over, the abuser may once again become violent.
The reasons for returning to an abusive partner may relate to the days of early humans, who had to fend for themselves in the wild. The powerful psychological mechanisms that lead people to stay in abusive relationships may have developed for survival reasons, Stosny said.
"To leave an attachment relationship -- a relationship where there's an emotional bond -- meant certain death by starvation or saber-tooth tiger," he said.
Abuse happens in both low-income and high-income couples, said Joanna Snawder, who counsels students and community members at the Metropolitan State College of Denver in Colorado. A wealthy woman who has never worked may not want to change her lifestyle, while a poor woman may be financially dependent on her boyfriend or husband.
Regardless, women may not want to break off an abusive relationship because they are afraid to be independent, don't know how to take care of themselves or don't want to face shame from friends and family, she said.
Sometimes the abuser can get his partner to stay with him through manipulation, for instance, telling a woman that he will kill himself if she leaves him, said Mark Crawford, a clinical psychologist based in Roswell, Georgia. Crawford has seen many women stay in relationships because they couldn't bear the guilt of an outcome such as this.
"There are some women who need to be needed so badly they'll put up with anything," Crawford said. "Even if the guy beats the crap out of them, they just feel that responsible for the other person."
The term "the cycle of abuse" is often used to describe how coming from an abusive family is believed to make an individual more likely to be an abuser or to stay in an abusive relationship. "Unless we do a lot of psychological work, we often repeat family structures and dynamics that seem normal to us," Snawder said.
On the other hand, some people who grow up in abusive households do not repeat the behavior they saw at home, she said.
One student Snawder advises voluntarily went back to her abusive boyfriend after having a restraining order placed against him. They are together, but the man is assaulting the young woman again.
"It's really important that a woman reach out and get support from friends, family or a counselor who can help her see that she doesn't have to go back to that relationship," she said.
Men aren't always the abusers. There are relationships in which the woman is the abuser and the man is the victim, and all of the behavioral patterns happen in reverse. For instance, the woman makes the man feel like it's his fault for being beaten, Crawford said.
"Those men just don't have the sense of self to say 'This is not acceptable,'" he said.
Stosny's celebrity clients who have been abusive to their romantic partners may have been negatively affected by their rise to fame early in life, he said. They see themselves as above others, and feel they are entitled to punch someone whenever they feel like it.
"I had one professional basketball player who sexually assaulted a girl. He really in his heart didn't believe that she didn't want to have sex with him," Stosny said.
Can there ever be a happy ending for an abusive relationship? Experts agree that it's unusual, but a relationship in which a partner has been violent can become healthy again if, and only if, the abusive person seeks counseling to change his or her mindset.
"If you don't believe that you have a problem, and you believe the person drove you to it, you're going to have a really hard time seeing that you have a problem," Snawder said.
In practice, however, the victim usually just needs to move on to someone else, she said.
Generals share their experience with PTSD
WASHINGTON (CNN) -- Army generals aren't known for talking about their feelings.
Brig. Gen. Gary S. Patton says he wants the military to change the way it views post-traumatic stress disorder.
1 of 2 But two high-ranking officers are doing just that, hoping that by going public they can remove the stigma that many soldiers say keeps them from getting help for post-traumatic stress disorder.
Brig. General Gary S. Patton and Gen. Carter Ham have both sought counseling for the emotional trauma of their time in the Iraq war.
"One of our soldiers in that unit, Spec. Robert Unruh, took a gunshot wound to the torso, I was involved in medevacing him off the battlefield. And in a short period of time, he died before my eyes," Patton told CNN in an exclusive interview. "That's a memory [that] will stay with me the rest of my life."
Ham was the commander in Mosul when a suicide bomber blew up a mess tent. Twenty-two people died.
"The 21st of December, 2004, worst day of my life. Ever," Ham said. "To this day I still ask myself what should I have done differently, what could I have done as the commander responsible that would have perhaps saved the lives of those soldiers, sailors, civilians."
Both generals have been back from Iraq for years, but still deal with some of the symptoms of the stress they experienced.
"I felt like that what I was doing was not important because I had soldiers who were killed and a mission that had not yet been accomplished," Ham said. "It took a very amazingly supportive wife and in my case a great chaplain to kind of help me work my way through that."
Ham and his wife drove from Washington State to the District of Columbia right after he returned from combat.
"I probably said three words to her the whole way across the country. And it was 'Do you want to stop and get something to eat?' I mean, no discussion, no sharing of what happened," he explained.
Ham still can't talk to his wife about much of what he saw.
For Patton the stress hits him in the middle of the night.
"I've had sleep interruptions from loud noises. Of course there's no IEDs or rockets going off in my bedroom, but the brain has a funny way of remembering those things," Patton said. "Not only recreating the exact sound, but also the smell of the battlefield and the metallic taste you get in your mouth when you have that same incident on the battlefield."
Both acknowledge that in military circles, there is still a stigma attached to admitting mental health problems.
"If you go ask for help somehow you believe it or you might believe others think it of you, that you're somehow weak. That's wrong and intellectually we all know it's wrong, but it's still there. It's still palpable in some communities," Ham said.
Patton wants to see a change in the way post-traumatic stress disorder is viewed by the military.
"We need all our soldiers and leaders to approach mental health like we do physical health. No one would ever question or ever even hesitate in seeking a physician to take care of their broken limb or gunshot wound, or shrapnel or something of that order. You know, we need to take the same approach towards mental health," Patton said.
Having two generals talk publicly about their own battles with stress and how counseling helped should help remove some of that. Patton said he wants servicemen and women to know that they can come forward.
"Know absolutely that your chain of command and your leadership in the military at our highest levels recognize this issue and want to encourage our soldiers to seek out that mental health assistance," Patton said.
Ham agreed. "I think, frankly, I think I'm a better general because I got some help."
Brig. Gen. Gary S. Patton says he wants the military to change the way it views post-traumatic stress disorder.
1 of 2 But two high-ranking officers are doing just that, hoping that by going public they can remove the stigma that many soldiers say keeps them from getting help for post-traumatic stress disorder.
Brig. General Gary S. Patton and Gen. Carter Ham have both sought counseling for the emotional trauma of their time in the Iraq war.
"One of our soldiers in that unit, Spec. Robert Unruh, took a gunshot wound to the torso, I was involved in medevacing him off the battlefield. And in a short period of time, he died before my eyes," Patton told CNN in an exclusive interview. "That's a memory [that] will stay with me the rest of my life."
Ham was the commander in Mosul when a suicide bomber blew up a mess tent. Twenty-two people died.
"The 21st of December, 2004, worst day of my life. Ever," Ham said. "To this day I still ask myself what should I have done differently, what could I have done as the commander responsible that would have perhaps saved the lives of those soldiers, sailors, civilians."
Both generals have been back from Iraq for years, but still deal with some of the symptoms of the stress they experienced.
"I felt like that what I was doing was not important because I had soldiers who were killed and a mission that had not yet been accomplished," Ham said. "It took a very amazingly supportive wife and in my case a great chaplain to kind of help me work my way through that."
Ham and his wife drove from Washington State to the District of Columbia right after he returned from combat.
"I probably said three words to her the whole way across the country. And it was 'Do you want to stop and get something to eat?' I mean, no discussion, no sharing of what happened," he explained.
Ham still can't talk to his wife about much of what he saw.
For Patton the stress hits him in the middle of the night.
"I've had sleep interruptions from loud noises. Of course there's no IEDs or rockets going off in my bedroom, but the brain has a funny way of remembering those things," Patton said. "Not only recreating the exact sound, but also the smell of the battlefield and the metallic taste you get in your mouth when you have that same incident on the battlefield."
Both acknowledge that in military circles, there is still a stigma attached to admitting mental health problems.
"If you go ask for help somehow you believe it or you might believe others think it of you, that you're somehow weak. That's wrong and intellectually we all know it's wrong, but it's still there. It's still palpable in some communities," Ham said.
Patton wants to see a change in the way post-traumatic stress disorder is viewed by the military.
"We need all our soldiers and leaders to approach mental health like we do physical health. No one would ever question or ever even hesitate in seeking a physician to take care of their broken limb or gunshot wound, or shrapnel or something of that order. You know, we need to take the same approach towards mental health," Patton said.
Having two generals talk publicly about their own battles with stress and how counseling helped should help remove some of that. Patton said he wants servicemen and women to know that they can come forward.
"Know absolutely that your chain of command and your leadership in the military at our highest levels recognize this issue and want to encourage our soldiers to seek out that mental health assistance," Patton said.
Ham agreed. "I think, frankly, I think I'm a better general because I got some help."
03 March 2009
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
